Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
