some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
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