who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
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