Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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