why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
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