i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
