how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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