if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Randomize
