We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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