I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Randomize
