Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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