I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize