you guys were way drunker than both of me
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Bring me that man meat
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
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