Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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