two words: eviction party
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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