i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
