Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
