Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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