I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
