i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
