Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Randomize
