Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
we're chasing vodka with high fives
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
