she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
