This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
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