its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
My penis needs a shock collar
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
