Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
