she was so not down for the gang bang
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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