..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize