Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize