Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
