I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
My dick has a subreddit
Randomize
