She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
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