i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
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