I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
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