But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
