He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Randomize
