You're so nebulous sometimes
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Randomize