this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize
