I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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