Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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