so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
