that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
I think I am morally bankrupt
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
