come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
