i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
