No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
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