What did we do last night that was yellow?
we're making bets on your personal life
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
