i think my tv is drunk
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
I just blew my weed a kiss
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Randomize
