Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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