smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Randomize