in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Randomize
