oh god the rape fog is back!
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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