when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
